Want to Talk?
Looking for ways you and your family can talk about these issues?
Substance Abuse
- Talk to an adult you trust about what the drug trends were when they were in high school. Discuss how they reacted to those situations. Make it personal, ask about all friends or family members who might have used.
- Talk to your parents about the ClearChoices presentations you have seen at your school. Consider the choices the speaker made and the consequences that followed, and whether you can relate to those situations.
- Tell your parents about a friend or someone you know who has experimented with drugs and the consequences, if any, they faced. Ask them if they have personally been around anyone who has had that level of difficulty with drugs.
- Talk about what your family’s position is on drugs. If you disagree with your parent's stance, tell them why you disagree and be prepared to listen to their reasoning.
- Parents - ask your kids what they think are the top few issues facing teens today, and how they are personally handling these issues. Ask how you can help them to better face these situations.
- Discuss what each of you knows about home drug testing kits and the ability to use them at any time. Talk about the issue of trust! Your parents trust you about your grades, but still do their job by asking to see your report card. Home drug testing kits provide you an “out” from negative peer pressure situations; a REAL way to say “No; my parents will test me.”
- Do you want to help a friend or sibling who uses drugs or alcohol? Click here to read some tips about how to help and start the conversation. Concerned about a parent? Check out this page by freevibe.com.
Alcohol Abuse/Binge Drinking
- Pop quiz! Did you know that alcohol is a depressant? It slows down your body’s reactions and your self-control, and keeps your brain from getting important messages about what’s going on with your body and things around you. Alcohol directly affects the things that keep you alive, like your central nervous system and your brain.
- Know the risks and protect yourself. The use of alcohol often comes with other risks like violence, traffic accidents, abuse, sexual assault, bad grades, depression and more. Tell your parents about a friend or someone you know who has experimented with alcohol and the consequences, if any, they faced. Have them share a story about someone they know too.
- Make definite plans with your friends. Play sports, go to the movies, go swimming, etc. Do things together with friends so you aren't bored. You are at greater risk of smoking, drinking, and using illegal drugs when you are bored (CASA, 2003). Don’t let the bad decisions you make today limit your future tomorrow!
- Get educated! Did you know:
- 6,000 people under 21 years of age die from alcohol-related injuries each year (Hingson and Kenkel, 2004).
- Drinking alcohol before age 21 may impact brain, organ, and bone development and may limit you from reaching future goals, like marriage, a job, an education, joining the military, or earning potential (Brown and Tapert, 2004).
- Alcohol kills 6.5 times more youth than all other illicit drugs combined (MADD.org).
- Binge drinking, or drinking five or more drinks in a short amount of time (about two hours), can lead to alcohol poisoning, which can be fatal. That is the same thing as an overdose!
- Talk about your family’s position on alcohol. What about when it’s just you and your parents? A religious service? If you disagree with your parent's stance, tell them why you disagree and be prepared to listen to their reasoning.
- If you struggle with alcohol or need help avoiding it among your peers, get the support you need. Talk to a parent, your family doctor, a school counselor, a spiritual leader, or another adult you trust.
Depression
- Tell someone! Explain to an adult (parent, teacher, family member, coach) or peer (friend, classmate) how you feel and why you might be suffering from depression. Can’t talk to them? Call Teen Lifeline @ 800-248-TEEN. Parents, make an appointment for your teen to see a doctor to assess for physical reason your teen is showing some of the symptoms they are feeling.
- Write down your thoughts and feelings on paper. It is healthy to express your feelings rather than keep them inside. Also consider talking about it! Talk to your parents about consulting with your school counselor and/or a specialist in adolescent psychology.
- Educate yourself on signs, symptoms, and causes of depression. Talk to your parents about any family medical history for patterns of depression.
- Don’t ignore it! Depression can often result in thoughts of teen suicide, which is the third-leading cause of death for young people ages 15 to 24 (American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry).
- Parents - Respect your child’s privacy, but be diligent in helping them locate the professional resources they need for assistance. Be sure to protect your child’s confidentiality while seeking professional help.
Eating Disorders
- Be informed. 1.7 million high school girls, and more than 300,000 high school boys have anorexia or bulimia (Cumella, 2004). 15% of Teenagers are OBESE in the United States (U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services, 2007) .
- If you know a problem exists, act now!
- Know your age appropriate BMI score. Go to the Department of Health and Human Services to check yours. According to the National Eating Disorders Association (2006), the average woman is 5’4 and weighs 142 lbs. The average model is 5’11 and weighs 117 lbs. According to the body mass index, the average model is at least 20 lbs. below his or her normal weight.
- Know your limits when it comes to getting or offering help. You and your family are not a substitute for professional care.
- Parents - Listen, don’t judge. Show your teen that you care and are concerned. Eating disorders are complicated. Try to listen and see things from the person’s point of view. Don’t oversimplify. Telling your teen to “just eat” or “just stop throwing up” isn’t the answer.
Safe Dating
How do you know if you are in a healthy relationship?
- Your partner respects and accepts you as an individual person. He or she does not try to control what you do, who you are friends with, and where you can go.
- The relationship has trust. Your partner does not become angry when you talk to members of the opposite sex or go out with your friends.
- Both you and your partner are honest with each other.
- You have your own identity. You and your partner spend time apart working, playing sports, hanging out with friends, or participating in school activities.
Take proactive steps!
- Be assertive!
- Before you start dating, figure out who you are, what you like to do, and what your personal beliefs/values are.
- Understand what your limits are and set them early. Tell your date how you feel; he or she might think you feel the same way they do. Set boundaries early, discuss what you are looking for in a relationship. Not every date will become a relationship.
- “I” statements are great ways to communicate during conflict situations. Instead of saying “You never listen to me!” or “You made me late!”, “I” statements give you the chance to express the way you feel.
- A relationship is between two people. You should never do something that is against your values/beliefs. Never do something you feel forced into doing.
- You have the choice to say no. Check for respect! Pay attention if your partner gets too close, touches you in a way you don’t like, or ignores your feelings or limits. It is okay to walk away if your partner does not respect your boundaries. Sexual activity without your consent is sexual assault and is NEVER your fault! The responsibility lies with the person who assaulted you.
- Never let your drink out of your sight. Even if you are not drinking alcohol, keep your drink with you at all times!
- Stay away from private, secluded places.
- Never accept drinks from strangers.
- Go on group dates with friends you trust.
Bullying/Internet Safety
What Can You Do?
- Bullying will continue unless you report it! Go to someone you trust and take a friend with you. Tell an adult! An adult can be a teacher, coach, neighbor, counselor, family, friend, or parent. Check out Report Someone and Save Lives.
- If the bullying does not stop after the first time you tell someone, don’t give up!
- Ignore the bully or walk away from them. If you show no fear the bullying might stop.
- Avoid the bully by taking a different route to school, avoiding where the bullying takes place, or begin hanging out with new friends.
- Parents - If your teen struggles with being bullied, offer your support and comfort no matter how upset you are. Kids are often reluctant to tell adults about bullying because they feel embarrassed that it's happening to them, or they worry that their parents will be disappointed. Sometimes teens feel like it's their fault they are being bullied. Sometimes they're scared that if the bully finds out that they told someone, the bullying will get worse. Others are worried that no one will believe them or help them do anything about it.
What to do if you are being cyber bullied, stalked, or approached by a predator:
- Save the entry – do not delete it! Do not engage in aggressive discussions even if someone begins threatening you. Show the messages to an adult.
- Show the authorities any email, instant messages, text messages, or postings you have.
- Contact law enforcement – cyber bullying/stalking is threatening harassment. In Arizona, cyber bullying/stalking is a felony.
How you can avoid cyber bullying and online stalkers.
- Talk to an adult. Explain what your concerns are on the internet.
- Know your families rules regarding the internet. Build trust by showing them what you do and where you go on the internet.
- Set your profiles to “private” so you control who sees your information on the internet, and don’t accept friend requests from strangers!
- Ask your parents to install software on the computer to protect your computer.